The Emotional Deficit of a Pastor

Col 3:12-15
12 Since God chose you to be the holy people whom he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
13 You must make allowance for each other's faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
14 And the most important piece of clothing you must wear is love. Love is what binds us all together in perfect harmony.
15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are all called to live in peace. And always be thankful. NLT

This verse reminds me that God does not ignore the emotional content of life. The emotional needs of our lives are more a part of us than we often acknowledge, they are real, and need to be met.

Pastor’s have feelings and emotions too. I am reminded of the time when a couple was in my office and she especially was chewing on me. (Why is it choleric women do this while their passive husbands sit by? ‘Yes, dear,’) Anyway, I had had enough of the debilitating attack and told her she was hurting my feelings. She responded that I could not have hurt feelings because I was a Pastor. (Memo to self, Pastors must relinquish their feelings upon entering the ministry.) When I told her I did, she went off on me again. (Talk about a Roman candle igniting and right there in my office!)

Here is a principle I want to discuss in a few blogs:
Pastors are in danger in living on an emotional deficit. That means what is surrounding them is more demanding than what is being put in them.

The result- a generation of dysfunctional pastors!

A dysfunctional pastor is one who has not learned to handle the emotional volume of his life.

They are pastoring dysfunctional people and when you get dysfunctional leadership ministering to dysfunctional people in the same way leadership is always a multiplying equation, instead of multiplying strengths, they end up multiplying weaknesses!

Is it no wonder that Pastors isolate themselves, ignore the emotional deficit or better yet turn to something (meth) or someone (sexual relationship) to mask the hurts?

More to come on this...