Be Merry!

Hattie covered her mouth, but the giggle escaped anyway. Boney Hughes lay under her kitchen sink, his upper body concealed by the cupboard. His legs sprawled over her linoleum flooring.

Boney scooted out from under the sink and peered up at her. ‘You think me rappin’ my old knuckles on these leaky pipes is funny?’

Unable to stifle her amusement, Hattie nodded. ‘You look like a . . .’ She fanned herself, trying to regain her composure while he stood. ‘Like a fish out of water.’

Boney’s winter-white eyebrows arched. ‘A big old river catfish?’

Giggling, she studied him from his wiry beard to his worn boots. ‘A smaller fish perhaps, but surely one with a big heart.’”
           

The proprietor of Miss Hattie’s boardinghouse and Mr. Boney understand the gift of a merry heart.
          
A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Proverbs 17:22 KJV

Amazing Frisbee (and Basketball) Shots!

A Woman's Simple Request!

Ouch men, can you relate to that!!!!

Self-Portrait Mania

Have you noticed the trend to take self portraits, no matter how unflattering they represent the shutterbug?  You see them posted everywhere! Well it is easy to do, it is so simple that even monkeys can do it!

To capture the perfect wildlife image, you usually have to be in exactly the right place at precisely the right time.

But in this instance, David Slater wasn’t there at all and he still got a result.

Visiting a national park in North Sulawesi, Indonesia, award-winning photographer Mr Slater left his camera unattended for a while.

It soon attracted the attention of an inquisitive female from a local group of crested black macaque monkeys, known for their intelligence and dexterity.

Fascinated by her reflection in the lens, she then somehow managed to start the camera. The upshot: A splendid self-portrait.

Yes, that's how easy it is to be a photographer!!!

What language do you speak?

A Swiss man, looking for directions, pulls up at a bus stop where two Americans are waiting. “Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?” he asks. The two Americans just stare at him. “Excusez-moi, parlez vous Fracais?” he tries. The two continue to stare. “Parlare Italiano?” No response. “Hablan ustedes Espanol?” Still nothing. The Swiss guy drives off, extremely disgusted.

The first American turns to the second and says, “Y’know, maybe we should learn a foreign language.” “Why?” says the other. “That guy knew four languages, and it didn’t do him any good.”

Tennis Entertainer- Mansour Bahrami

Thank you Tim for this video- amazing!




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Sometimes We Have to Laugh at Ourselves!

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Sign of the Times!

Can you say 'snap!'

HOW DRY IS IT IN TEXAS?

It's so dry in Texas that the Baptists are starting to baptize by sprinkling,

the Methodists are using wet-wipes,

the Presbyterians are giving out rain-checks,

and the Catholics are praying for the wine to turn back into water.

Now that's dry!

Hail or Hell ???

Living in Texas I believe in Hail? Why? I have experienced it firsthand! I have held softball size hail in my hand (yes, I was foolish and ran outside to pick one up as others fell around me leaving divots in the ground!). I have had to replace my roof twice as well as our church's roof. I am a believer!

I am also a believer in another kind of hell! I have not experienced it and really don't plan to! I do believe those who have described it, personal accounts from the Bible of those there and what they are experiencing, and how those there don't want any of their loved ones to follow them there. (Lk 16:19-31, notice red letter words!) Hell was designed for the Satan and those that want to follow him there! Their choice!

Much has been discussed recently about Hell with the publishing of Rob Bell's bold book 'Love Wins.' The discussion has been on Twitter, Facebook, blogs, videos, Fox News, Hannity, Bill O'Reilly and now the cover of Time Magazine. I could add my 2 cents worth, but choose not to as there are those that have done a most adequate job. Check this link for a good overview and thoughts,....

I do believe the Bible, Jesus' frequent discussion of hell, the Revelation account of the end of all things, so just so you know, I believe in a literal Hell! I believe in personal salvation through the precious blood of Jesus Christ. To accept His atoning sacrifice gives one heaven and to refuse it gives one hell! That is the impetus for my preaching and going into all the world to share this glorious gospel!

I am not moved by other's arguments or opinions! We as Pastors are to be good communicators and what we say people should be able to understand it, not cause confusion by it. Maybe sometimes our sound speech is not clear! Titus 2:1, 7-8.

Here is a cute story that my friend Carrie Sims Burnett recounts regarding her son Cade:

When the Arlington sirens went off yesterday we drove to an undercover place for car shelter and Cade was terrified! Later to find out this morning as to why he kept saying he hated "the devil." He thought Hell was coming instead of Hail!! He thought the devil was coming! poor baby! LOL..

Don't be caught misunderstanding the difference between Hail and Hell!

Body as a Temple!

Can you relate?

Old Age Speak!

Old age has it's own language I am finding out! Consider the following:

ATD -at the doctors.

BFF -best friend fell.

BTW -bring the wheelchair.

BYOT -bring your own teeth.

FWIW -forgot where I was.

GHA -got heartburn again.

IMHO -is my hearing aid on.

LMDO -laughing my dentures out.

OMMR -on my massage recliner.

OMSG -oh my! sorry, gas.

ROFLACGU -rolling on floor laughing and can't get up.

TTYL -talk to you louder.

Can you add any? Please do....

My Favorite Animal...

My Favorite  Animal
 
Our teacher asked us what our favorite animal  was, and I said, "Fried chicken."  She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else in the class laughed.
 
My parents told me to always be truthful and honest, and I am.  Fried chicken is my favorite animal.  I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member of  PETA.  He said they love animals very much.  I do, too.  Especially chicken, pork and beef.
 
Anyway, my teacher sent me to the principal's office.  I told him what happened, and he laughed, too.  Then he told me not to do it  again.
 
The next day in class my teacher asked me what my favorite live animal was.  I told her it was chicken.  She asked me why, just like she'd asked the other children.  So I told her it was because you could make them into fried chicken.  She sent me back to the principal's office again.  He laughed, and told me not to do it again.  I don't  understand.  My parents taught me to be honest, but my teacher doesn't like it when I am.
 
Today, my teacher asked us to tell her what famous person we admire most.  I told her, "Colonel Sanders."  Guess where I am now . . . .

Value of Bran Muffins????

The couple were 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies.

Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.

One day, their good health didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven.

They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet.

They gasped in astonishment when he said, "Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now."

The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. "Why, nothing," Peter replied, "remember, this is your reward in Heaven."

The old man looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth.

"What are the greens fees?", grumbled the old man. "This is heaven," St. Peter replied. "You can play for free, every day."

Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, free flowing beverages. "Don't even ask," said St. Peter to the man. "This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy."

The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife. "Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods, and the decaffeinated tea?" he asked.

"That's the best part," St. Peter replied. "You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like, and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!"

The old man pushed, "No gym to work out at?" "Not unless you want to," was the answer.

"No testing my sugar or blood pressure or..." "Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself."

The old man glared at his wife and said, "You and your bran muffins. We could have been here ten years ago!"

Laugh and Dance!

Keep on laughing and dancing!

Can't see image, go here. Look for March 17, 2011 post.

Future of Dental Healthcare?

Love this video!!!
can't see video? click here.

I Lied - - A Confession!

This post sent to me was too good to pass up. If you have ever done anything with Apple, Adobe, Banks, Credit Cards,... then the following is all too familiar to you. Read and enjoy this confession! I did! DK

I must admit, I lied. I flat out, no doubt about it, lied.

Not only must I admit to that lie, but I've lied many other times too. Some of you are shocked that I would lie and brazenly admit it but if you examine yourselves you're not so pure either.

I lied to Apple.

I was downloading something from Apple and they presented me with their updated Terms and Conditions for the iTunes store. I had to check a box that said that I had read the Terms and Conditions and that I agreed to them.

It was 58 pages on my phone.

58 PAGES!!!

Everyone who has an iPhone or who downloads from iTunes has to say that they have READ and agree to the Terms and Conditions.

I am sure that some have read all 58 pages but I doubt if it is anyone you or I know. Everyone we know lied too.

The symbol of Apple is an apple with a bite out of it. I wonder where that is from? It forces everyone who downloads anything from iTunes to either spend an hour reading the Terms and Conditions the first time and every time it is updated or it forces them to become liars.

Sure, it's just a little lie. It's just a little bite out of the truth. What does a little lie matter?

I don't want to pick on Apple, other companies do it with their Terms and Conditions and EULA's (End User License Agreements) that would take a software lawyer an hour to read and understand.

You should be given three options instead of two:
1. I don't agree and thus reject this product.
2. I have read the Terms and Conditions (or EULA) and agree.
3. I haven't read it because it would take a ridiculously long time but I blindly accept whatever it says on faith that I won't get unfairly treated.

They may want to leave that unfairly treated part out since you may be treated unfairly. Other users probably want to substitute a more vulgar term for unfairly treated.

Until that third option is added, to Apple and the other companies with over a two paragraph Terms of Agreement statement, I am forewarning you, I will lie.

Truthfully,
Pastor Nathaniel Bronner Jr.

My Favorite Commercial of All Time!

Is it wrong for a former Drill Sergeant turned Pastor to enjoy this commercial so much?

Nope, I love it on so many levels!!!!! Hahahaha!

Does a former Drill Sergeant make a terrible Pastor?

can't see video click here

If God Started Tweeting-

Great comic about God tweeting!

Photographer Wedding Hazards!

can't see video- click here.