Thursday, August 28, 2008

I Am Voting Democrat because....

Well, after 3 nights of the Democratic Convention, I have decided to vote Democrat this year. With all the speeches given before Obama's tonight, I am convinced! Here are great reasons to do so...

I’m voting Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

I’m voting Democrat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

I’m voting Democrat because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they’re doing because they now think we’re good people.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that people who can’t tell us if it will rain on Friday CAN tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don’t start driving a Prius.

I’m voting Democrat because I’m not concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as THEY see fit.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would NEVER get their agendas past the voters.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that when the terrorists don’t have to hide from us over there, when they come over here I don’t want to have any guns in the house to fight them off with.

I’m voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my horse.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe oil companies’ profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn’t.

Makes you wonder why anyone would EVER vote Republican , now doesn’t it?

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Thank you to Caleb Menikos where I first saw this and to Bud Simmons.

5 comments:

lasshoml said...

what is this???

Jungle Mom said...

I may have to borrow this as well.

Pastor David said...

>lasshoml- it's a joke, really it is- I vote Republican!
>jungle mom- do it!

Anonymous said...

I’m voting Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

Every politician this side of Ron Paul believes in taxes, which means that, in the most cynical sense, they believe they’ll spend your money better than you will. Where Republicans and Democrats differ is which taxes should exist and how much they should be. Democrats believe in raising the estate tax, the capital gains tax, and taxes on high incomes families. In other words, they believe that those who can afford to pay more should.

One might argue that, in general, Democrats favor more taxes collected overall and they would be correct. Low taxes are fine if we are also fine with less government programs. The alternative is increasing national debt, which has been the result of the last two two-term Republican Presidents, who lowered taxes while failing to lower spending.

Which effect wins? Democrats taking more taxes from the rich or Republicans having lower taxes overall? Long story short: it depends. But as a tangible example, under President Obama, 95% of families would pay fewer taxes than they do under President Bush.

I’m voting Democrat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

You’ll have to forgive my ignorance when I admit I have little idea what you are talking about. I guess you might be saying that Democrats are generally more “PC” than Republicans, but I seriously doubt that many are in favor of legislating this by banning “offensive” words, etc.

As far as wanting to ban free speech that offends people, I think the Republican Party is overwhelmingly guiltier. “Family values” Republicans are in the lead on censorship in the music, film, and TV industries. Republicans are also generally in favor of a flag burning ban. Often it is the ACLU, a demon to Republicans, that supports the freedom of speech in its most unpalatable instances, such as the KKK and neo-nazi groups.

I’m voting Democrat because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they’re doing because they now think we’re good people.

By the “bad guys” I can only assume you mean terrorists. Actually, terrorists are in Iraq because we are. Before us, it was just your standard totalitarian regime. How invading Iraq made us any safer from the “bad guys” is also a mystery, as Saddam Hussein didn’t possess WMDs. In fact, by stretching our military thin and costing us billions of dollar and thousands of lives, it is easy to imagine that it may have made us less safe.



I’m voting Democrat because I believe that people who can’t tell us if it will rain on Friday CAN tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don’t start driving a Prius.

This is a funny image. I can just imagine a bunch of weathermen huddled around a table coming up with the idea of global warming. Actually, scientists have agreed not only that global warming is occurring, but also that it is being caused by mankind.

What a US President would expect of Americans to reduce our greenhouse emissions is a bit of a mystery because President Bush (and, to a lesser extent, President Clinton) completely dropped the ball. I can personally promise you that it will not include mandatory Prius driving. Actually, it would be better if you walked, biked, or took public transportation to work. There are any number of simple incentive systems that could be put into place and behavioral changes that people could make that would only marginally affect how we live, but that could help quite a bit. And if trying not to harm the planet for future generations doesn’t get you excited, remember we’d also be reducing our dependence on foreign oil.

I’m voting Democrat because I’m not concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

Some Democrats are pro-death penalty and some are not. However, it is hard for me to understand how a person can call themselves pro-life when only applying it to pre-natal life. Surely criminals are life, as are soldiers.

By reading this statement, I can safely assume you believe life begins at conception. That’s fine; however, many people disagree. Democrats want people to be able to make that choice for themselves and to ensure that both alternatives are safe.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as THEY see fit.

The sentiment that Democrats believe that businesses should only break even is pretty laughable. It’s true that Democrats are in favor of taxes on businesses’ profits, as are Republicans. These taxes are progressive, meaning smaller businesses pay a smaller percentage, and they peak at 38%.

Finally, I’m confused by your use of the word ‘THEY’ in the last line. Taxes don’t go to politicians, they go towards paying for things like roads, schools, police officers, and the military, services we all enjoy and benefit from.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would NEVER get their agendas past the voters.

I imagine the “pointy headed elitist liberals” you’re referring to are the liberal justices of the Supreme Court and of various circuit courts. Turns out, several of the so-called liberal justices were appointed by Republican presidents.

The real crux of this complaint is how we should interpret the constitution. Our founding fathers never intended it to be an inflexible document, as the ninth amendment clearly dictates. And it’s a good thing too because we now believe that all men and women are created equal. And then there are time we just get it wrong, like the 18th amendment.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that when the terrorists don’t have to hide from us over there, when they come over here I don’t want to have any guns in the house to fight them off with.

This is ironic because the second amendment is so anachronistic that it intended gun owners to form a militia to keep the power of the government in check. Modern day Americas might even call those types of people terrorists.

But don’t worry! Most Democratic politicians don’t want to take your guns from you. They’re merely in favor of reasonable restrictions like safety measures, background checks, and banning semi-automatics. Can’t we all agree that our founding fathers didn’t intend for us to own Uzis and tech-9s?

I’m voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my horse.

I’ll give you credit. Republican politicians realized that gay bashing crosses the line, but you just came out and said it. Still, comparing two people getting married and you marrying your horse? Are those really the same to you?

I’m voting Democrat because I believe oil companies’ profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn’t.

Who “makes” more on a gallon of gas can be found here. To summarize: it depends. Oil companies, on average, make 8-9%. The real issue is that who they buy oil from, oil producing countries (Saudi Arabia, Russia, etc.), make far more than that. If the US could switch to domestic oil sources only or to some other fuel produced locally, then the money would stay with American companies and the problem would be solved.

Pastor David said...

>anon- thanks for taking the time to write the 'DNC talking points'- always enjoy hearing them again.

And yes- I do believe life begins at conception- there are some moral absolutes that one must have in this life as a compass and there is no better place to start than with God and the Bible- not what other people believe.

Being ignorant doesn't make a person right or validate his opinion!